Wednesday, December 30, 2009

sadness much?

I was loading the niga higa videos so that Kak Ain could watch it without annoyance. i was so excited to show it when suddenly when i finish loading, i noticed the TV down stair's switched off. when i look down, Kak Ain already went to sleep. i feel SO sad. Gawd. I ws so excited to show it because I know there's nobody else in this house who would want to watch it with me but Kak Ain and when i penat-penat load it for her, she went to sleep. i literally feel like crying. like, if I go to school at least I could share it with my buddies but masalahnyer I'm at home. It's the school holidays. I have nothing to do but rewatch and rewatch this video. And then when I want to share it, kat Facebook bukan orang layan. twitter lagi boring. so who else, I ask you? Bakmal's getting ready for his midnight outing and obviously he wont get the joke so much (I think). And even if he does, he's not exactly the type of person who would discuss these type of things again and again everytime it's an awkward situation. Mom? Jangan haraplah. Either she wouldn't laugh at it, fake a laugh at the end just to tease me which will only make me feel worse or not watch it at all in the end because half way she'll say, "Boring la," which will still hurt me because I like the video. I thought it was INTERESTING and getting another opinion saying it's not? just HEARTBREAKING. Seriously. and if it's from mom, even worse. i mean, she's MOM. okay more specifically, MY mom. if she says something, we all have to agree or she's pura-pura merajuk which will annoy us all. so we have to pretend we agree with her. and it's gotten to me. now, it's as if all that mom's says IS right when sometimes it isn't.

Abang. no way. Kak Ain is like, his pengganti now from watching my 'childish' videos, and apparently where ever he goes, Kak Ain goes (except for work) so if Abang goes to sleep, so does she. If Abang goes upstairs, so does she. if Abang goes downstairs, so. does. she. now i'm not in the mood for niga higa videos. i feel too sad to be told. Oh, last person on the list? Ayah. boring old Ayah. his interests? music, guitar. well, his taste, that is. others? me getting into writing and music too. me revising all my languages (ie, Malay, English and Japanese (amature) ) and getting good grades. me browsing through his oh-so-thick books. no way he'll laugh to Niga Higa. seriously.

well, all my mom says goes right? because she's ALWAYS right, right? well, she told me to go to sleep, even though apparently don't you think that's suppose to be my decision? when to go to sleep and stuff? <----pissed off at everyone.

well, even though i totally ignored her, i'm still going to have to stop or mom wouldn't talk to me tomorrow. night. 

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