Saturday, February 19, 2011

don't I have a heart?

when the hella was this?!

someone asked where I came from when he saw this. amazing.


On Friday, I forgot to mention that we had a Maulidur Rasul celebration, so like we saw a couple of videos blarghblarghblargh then the last vid we saw was of an abortion. the starting itself was like "OKAY WTF" cuz it was literally blood pouring out of your va-ge-ge <-- that's how we pronounce it lol. but then when they were showing the dead lil babies I was just watching. after that also I didn't really feel anything but disgusted. even Nuryn said I was cold-hearted.

then today there was a post on Tumblr that said "Reblog if you're against child abuse" and there was a picture of some kid bleeding and bruised. at first I didn't think about reblogging it, cuz like what can we do if we reblog it anyway? can we catch all those people who did child abuse? no. but then I saw the line down there that said "If you don't reblog, you don't have a heart." and I reblogged.

cuz literally, I DO have a heart. but somehow, I really can't feel anything these days. it's like all my emotions are shut down. 

but there were feelings such as worry, and conscious-ness. 

what is this feeling?? it feels like I'm the worst person on Earth there's no one there for me. and when someone does come, I turn that person down like she will never solve my problems.

heck what the hell is wrong with me?? there's nothing that can solve my problem. unless that person says something first. but right now it seems like that person hates me. heck I hate me.

what the hell am I doing here?


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