Wednesday, April 27, 2011

I feel useless.

It's like everyone is better than me. Like I'm the worst person on Earth.

Yea emo mood whatever. Wondering if there's any human out there who's willing to here me crap about how miserable I am while I finish up my komsas notes tomorrow in the library during recess.

Lately a lot of people are going to the library to either study or finish up their homework or disturb their friends during recess. When the library is supposed to be quiet, peaceful and cooling, it has become an official hang out place during recess - meaning it is now full of whispery chatter and warm of body heat. I wonder if our wonderful new principle will take any action about this.

I remember on Monday since all form 3's were staying back the usual place where I sit with other students of 2G-H '10 and 3E-F '11 were crowded, and the walkway between that table and the table next to it was flooded with bags. I mean, there's like 10 regulars from each class, and 5 stays back on each day, means the most we usually get is like 10 or 12, but imagine that day all of us had to stayback. minus those who couldn't care less about sukantara, there were about 20 of us that day. going to SA, there's an unsaid rule where you have to bring at least two bags each day.
Imagine the flood.

I just typed out a bunch of crap and just figured, well, I'm human. I'm not perfect and never will be, but as long I as I try my best, I'm okay.


Sunday, April 24, 2011


everybody needs a little blogging time.

Mom should let me use the laptop. There were things  wanted to blog but I have no feel for it anymore. But I feel like I should update, so I'll try my best to write something interesting...

First and formost, lets give way to senior bloggers... -->[link] looks like one of my favourite bloggers (harr its probably the only actual blog that I follow that blogs serious stuff and doesn't revolve on his/her own life, as if it was a diary, but rather a place for people to actually read and gain knowledge) has gotten his umph back.

Secondly, here's a nice song. by Code Name Blue.

Man I love slow CN Blue songs <3 (BTW Burning is mine okayy >I)

Thirdly, last week was actually quite okay compared to other weeks :3 The chess competition was last week, and I met Joy! :D I think I hugged her too tightly though haha. had fun for two recesses, then she was like 'Well, it'll be a while until we can meet again' so to avoid tears I said a quick goodbye. No hug. I think if I hugged her again I wouldn't have let go.

other than that I had an experience (can't quite describe this experience) on Wednesday when we stayed back for Girl Guides. It wasn't during the boring men-dobi thing (we did that, it was for the juniors ^^) but after, when teacher let us off early because she had to go somewhere. it was quite a nice day, cool and dense. but then rain came and then thunder, then the wind blew so hard it was monstrous really. us guides were at the canteen. the wind blew hard, until something broke, not sure what though. being a typical girl's school, screams were heard.
there were also some girls at the Pondok Ilmu. I pitied them the most, because they're trapped there, like a boat in a storm. if someone knocks a person off the boat, she'd be killed by the thunder or just be soaking wet. Funny though, because Jia Yi didn't mind getting wet of rain water.
so that was actually quite fun because we can't talk without being intrupted by the thunder. yea, that's fun. I have an amazing life *rolls eyes*

then on Friday we didn't learn anything *insertepichappyface*
and also on Friday I went to tuition. left early though, so... then Khairun gave some good news :D and happy news~~ starting next week, I'm officially going for 2-6 every Friday ^3^ woots~ more time with my hommies~~
but I forgot something though. My piano class is now on Mondays 5.30-6.30. this Monday I have sukantara until 4 e_e mom will be pissed... I don't wanna miss it though, sukantara is usually fun because you get to hang around everywhere :D

wait. so if there's sukantara this week.. there's no house practice? :DD YAY no kawad for another week~ but then after this there's only kawad =3= have to deal with it though. it's not like I'm talented in any type of sport whatsoever.


Wednesday, April 20, 2011

of love and music.


Well this link sort of made me wake up a bit.
Never wanting a boyfriend now XD


P.S, ee apehal banyak jerawat batu pulak nihh?? bencinyer.. >(

Monday, April 18, 2011

I thought.

I thought today's f(x)'s comeback..... WHAT A BUMMER :( They're always delaying it like this... maybe we have to wait a little longer... -sigh- I can't the whole night here though. I have homework.

I don't know. things don't seem real anymore. Maybe I shouldn't hope for anything. If I do, I'll get my heart broken to easily. I should expect the worse.

He doesn't like me. I was just perasan-ing. Who would like me? I'm so ugly. I'm so unattractive. I can't keep thinking all these things. I should let them all fade away.


Friday, April 15, 2011

when you're alone.

There wasn't a particularly good one but the song is sad enough so I thought what the heck, any cover would do. Now I'll just search for the piano sheet (since I'm not Eva)...



It hurts to know that you don't matter to your friends.
It hurts to know that there won't be that one friend who'll be there for you, and only you, so you can do the same for her.
It hurts to feel like you have to stand up for youself all the time, and never get the chance to trust that someone's got your back.

It hurts to know that it's you who has been a bitch all along, and now you're getting it all back.


Thursday, April 14, 2011

life can be adventurous.

So today us Girl Guides (ten form 4 Rangers,including Zalikha, Azriana, Uma and Natasha, and five form 3 Guides - me, Zulaikha, Nadhrah, Xueh Wei and Shahira) went to Klang for the celebration of the 100th year of Guiding, with World Association of Girl Guides and Girl Scouts (WAGGGS). funny funny. It was completely and 99% useless, and that 1% was just for experience.
So the adventure started when we (me and Xueh Wei) had to get out of Maths class, which was taught by a disiplin teacher, so before anything I felt sick to the stomach. Thankfully my grandma Zalikha came to tell teacher that we had to go. So we were saved :D so we went to 3F, but they were at the Science lab. So we went to 3A to fetch Shahira, but then she was doing her kerja kursus @_@ so then we met up with Nadhrah so we decided to change in 3F. Zulaikha came later on to change with. Oh God I'm talking in too much detail.

So canteen, lunch by ourselves, Shahira went with Zalikha and some other seniors, we went with Cik Mariam. spent our time talking bout Tumblr, listening to music, worrying about getting lost and rushing Xueh Wei to either take out her Touch n Go card or talk to a Chinese student about the location of SM Kwang Hua. So we finally arrive to our destination (?). We went in after seeing some other guides going in, and teacher left us. Our lives are now at our own stake.

So we walked uphill to a very village/campus-ish atmosphere, following this group of Guides with a teacher. the students are still in class, so tried guessing how the system goes here. Later on gave up. Plus we got bigger problems - it seems as if there were not many Girl Guides around.

Suddenly this lady from a group of Guides we've been stalking came to us to tell that we got the wrong school. We actually had to go to the private Kwang Hua, which was at the other side of the ... thing. so we walked back downhill, and to the other school. Tiring? yes, but it was just a walking distance so.

when we finally arrive and entered the school, a Guide was blowing her whistle and people started gathering at the court and we're like 'O.O Are we supposed to go??' but we decided to stay, until this other Guide told us to go upstairs. and when she said upstairs, she meant the top floor, which is like, the fourth or fifth floor. we were totally not ready for two flight of stairs per floor, so we panted ourselves into this auditorium they have. it was actually kinda cool, like our hall, only smaller, has air-con and chairs. but the chairs were the ones with the adjustable tables, so that caused a lot of problems, see. I'll tell later.

so they had some speeches and there were some funny parts because of lack of preparation or skill, where the form 4's can't help but laugh and I'm here like "lol control yourselves. respect la sikit." Shahira started off with the guys thingy again, telling me she saw a cute scout. then the ceremony ended after the pledges and we're like 'e__e how... simple.' so yeah after that they gave us food (at first it was hard for us Muslims to eat it, since it's a Chinese school but HEY, this isn't Singapore. It's Malaysia. And the most respected guest here is Muslim so yeah.) which is curry puff and donut. I had like two more bites left of the curry puff when Zulaikha asked if she can have some and I gave the whole thing. The donut was really hard to eat, with the amount of sugar on it and amount of tissues absent. So after a fly landed on mine I guess it was a good enough reason to stop eating it.

So here's where the tables make trouble.

they gave us cool water bottles which are only cool because the label has the Girl Guide badge, and Shahira being as careful as ever warned to put my bottle on the floor so that if I stand up the bottle won't fall. just before there had been like two or three accidents that involves people standing up, unconsious there were items on the table - one of them involves me trying to get the pen in my bag - but yet the message didn't get through so more accidents came. A bottle of water dropped and spilled under Nadhrah's chair. I was passing by, and apparently brought mud tracks from my dirty shoes around. I didn't move until my shoe dried. Then Zulaikha's bottle fell while she was trying to get up. Me, trying to not look bad since the bottle went by me, tried to get the bottle... resulting on my phone sliding beautifully down my own table, thus crashing into pieces. Shahira, being all careful yet again, got my food so that much was saved. but seeing my phone, I went to OTL position.

Thankfully, it didn't actually 'break'. The back cover just seperated from the phone, making the battery fall out too, so it looks all broken but not really. it happened a million times, truthfully, but still.

I gave Zulaikha's bottle back to her. "Put it on the floor so that it wouldn't fall." And then I sat quietly, fixing my phone.

So after eating the seniors had a camwhoring moment and went all cute and funny. Us juniors just sat there laughing, while Ksherah and Uma took pictures. Zalikha was so lame lol, Elsa had this tak-leh-blah face and Natasyah had this cute face on. Then I realized that everyone else were mingling with other schools (except for the school sitting behind us) so we tried to do the same. apparently, one of the girls told Xueh Wei that some of the girls can't speak English, which is really sad, seriously. So Xueh Wei became our translator for a while, until we had to leave.

So we said our goodbyes (to no one in particular) and went downstairs. While everyone else were busy getting to their transportation vehicles, me, the Jalil sisters (lol Zalikha and Shahira I mean), Zulaikha, Xueh Wei and Nadhrah were left there to wait for Uncle Jalil (HAAAAAH GET IT) to take us back to school.

So after everyone else left we were there so sesated in the middle of the road. Not that we noticed, until cars tried to rampage on us. so we moved to the side, where there was a roof and other students lol. So Zalikha was being all friendly to this student (who later we found out was a form 5 and Zalikha got intimidated) while Shahira was obsessing about her Scout (who was watching people play ping pong). so bored, we decided to go watch the basketball practice.

The first thing Zalikha saw was the statue of Consujfabsfla . The Wise dude that Xueh Wei mentioned. so Zalikha wanted to take a picture with it.

Notice the hands. Then we just sat there on the benches that you can see peeking into this picture. We watched the basketball game. Nad told me she wants to play and I'm like 'lol I know I'm not gonna be good at it so I'm not gonna even try' then Shahira was pointing some guys out and I'm like "...none of them are cute..." then I finally saw one. I waited a while before telling, just in case it was a moment thing, his cuteness. but then after I told Xueh Wei and Shahira 'tu tu, the green shirt one... yeah yeah hijau cair.. not the purple pants one...' Xueh Wei said I had good taste *grins* then it began.

I didn't even notice it, until Zalikha tegur I. she said that I looked so into the game like obvious sangat and I'm like OMG WHATEHECK so I attacked Zulaikha. When I get all nervous and embarrassed I always attack Ika. so then I kept asking 'really? really?? was it that obvious?? lololol omg im gonna die' then they told me it wasn't that obvious... until Shahira told them. >///< gaargh segan gak la.

so we tried to do other things like figure out kanji's that we learned and asked Xueh Wei if this characters means this this this.. the first kanji I saw was 'hito' which means human XD


So meanwhile, Shahira took pictures and videos of the guy in green shirt XD seriously funny, but he's really cute too >w<

so after a while there was an announcement. we asked Xueh Wei, but she didn't catch it. so all the dudes started lining up so we decided to leave. we passed by the Scout and Shahira got all excited :P she wanted a picture of him too, but I didn't get a good shot so. so we decided to sit at this flight of stairs outside. yet our transport isn't here yet. so everyone decided to contact their parents and all my phone being the victim. thank God I had credit lol. no one brought their phone because we came from school. I was being a dare devil, guessing they wouldn't have a spot check. Xueh Wei scolded me and stuff but in the end she didn't care. mom called and scolded me too ><"

then after awhile we walked back to the canteen hurr. as we pass by the court we could feel people staring lol. then we bought snacks and relaxed. we saw the green shirt guy stopped playing and was texting. his phone was green too, lol. Shahira and I guessed he likes the colour green XD so after a while of relaxing, finally we got a phone call from Uncle Jalil, saying he's here :D Green shirt guy left earlier, which is sad but whatever XD (think about it - he might not even know English!!)

we settled into the car, I messaged my mom, she told me to sms when we arrive in Shah Alam. they were using GPS which to me, wasn't really a good solution since they always use the hardest ways. but then again my brother's a walking GPS so we never actually needed it.

I'm not really sure how it goes, but someone put on some Japanese drama on their TV. Of course I've heard of it, I have Tumblr - One Pound Gospel. It was interesting, definitely, but it made me feel sick >< reminder to self - never watch TV on a car. got to school, said our goodbyes, went back home. I helped send Nadhrah back to her grandma's house, and there were some kids playing on the road (notice it's on the road, not at the side of the road) and Nadhrah laughed seeing this kid doing this funny dance thing.

came back home, slept.

The End.


Can you see us? ;) clue : we're in the middle ;D

lol blogger you're annoying

Love Song - Big Bang.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

lol emo emo emo.

I'm supposed to do my Geo work, but I'm watching MBLAQ's Art of Seduction instead. *dies* today is so emo. I feel like everyone that matters is posting up all emo statuses.
gaah I should do my Kerja kursus. even Eva finished hers up lol. up to 8.4 lagi. I was told to only do till 8.3 T T kkkkkk byebyebyebye missumissumissu l8rl8rl8r


eva's new blog. totally girlier.
what happened to tigers?

BTW Cry piano ver is beautiful :')


Saturday, April 9, 2011

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

the road to fandom.


I think this was like the same phase when I was crazy of SHINee. It seems like everything they do is perfect T_T

Even this.



The image of Joon's starting - face was all "OMGG MY GUYY HE IS SOO DREAMYY GAAARGH" then comes in him putting his beautiful face on a girl's shoulder. THEN THE KISS SCENES


At the end of the video - eheeheehee she died :3


Mir's hair - PERFECT. I'd always loved this two-shade type of hairstyles. and it fits Mir PERFECTLY.
And the dance is just awesome.

It doesn't matter what you think, I matter in my life, not you.


Tuesday, April 5, 2011

k-pop comparisons.

Heng Yen Fern, you look like Kim Jaejoong. Trust me.

Today when I sat next to you dring Jap it was even more confirmed. Since BOTH OF YOU HAVE DOUBLE EYELIDS (well technically only your left eye has doule eyelids but whatever)

Compare between the above picture with the person in the middle of the second picture. Just admit it Yen Fern. somehow your love for Jae has affected your appearence. I wonder if I'll look like Taemin soon

And I saw Farah Shahirah before I went back home. Yeah her teeth does look a bit like Taec's, except I think his is BIGGER XD it wouldn't be pretty for a girl to have big teeth anyway.. it's just the way they stick out is all :)

It's amazing how some people just look like other people. Remember when we went to Singapore and found a bunch of Korean-look-a-like's? XD we've gotta do that some more.

Have you ever wondered where your look-a-like is living? How he/she lives? Is she happy? What goes on in that person's life? is it better than yours? is it worse?
Yen Fern got hers covered.


Just recently, I watched this video of IU and Thunder from MBLAQ singing together. And I'm like " these two are so cute with each other."







What happened to JasonXPilsuk though?

I'm confused. Which pairing is better? XD


My bias from SS501. Apparently I didn't even notice it was him, until I eventually found he's from SS501 and I'm like.. is that him? Yea I didn't even know his name T_T Park Jung Min.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

i don't know...

... but it seems to be a trend to have a boyfriend/girlfriend from a different race these days.

I know I should support 1Malaysia but...

...I wanna have a Korean boyfriend....



Jae, you kill me every time.

Eva told me to listen to this so I thought, hey, why not. It's not bad. If I wasn't into K-POP, I would've loved it.