Wednesday, April 4, 2012


too. many. emotions. cannot. sustain.

yesterday I spent half of the day with Nuryn and Nurin. confused? don't be. they're both the Nury/ins from 4SB. so anyways Nurin had this eraser that wrote 100%, anything's possible, yeah for sure, no way, dream on and whatever. so we started 'predicting our futures' which was funny because if it's true, I'll end up marrying a hot Chinese guy who's rich but I won't be happy. I'll get three kids. I won't marry a Korean. everything else were anything's possible so. then we started to get bored with it because the eraser totally had a crush on Nadiah and kept giving her 100% or yeah for sure so we started playing Truth. we asked a bunch of crush questions and I just realized somethings about myself.

I won't have a crush on a guy who has a girlfriend or just recently broke up with a girl I know.
If a friend of mine just broke up with a guy I had a crush on, I would go to her instead of him.
Well I wouldn't have a crush on him in the first place.
Easily said, guys with girlfriends (meaning like he's had a couple and not known for staying single) is a major turn off for me.
I guess I just want someone who's been searching for someone who's special, like I am. I guess he'd appreciate me more because it's not like he has a line of girls lining up for him. Not because he's not nice but because they didn't see anything special about him.
I wish I'll find someone who I can make feel special. Even if I don't mean it. like I just find him attractive but not the way everyone else does. someone special like that, it's not easy to find.

I read a manga once where there were three friends - two guys and a girl. one of the guy wanted to date the girl and she agreed simply because he's a nice guy. but then the girl actually liked the other guy without herself knowing but the guy loved both of them the same so he didn't wanna ruin their relationship and -- well this is all beside the point. I just wonder if I was in the same situation as the girl, would I break up with the boy and break his heart, or should I let go of my crush. it's hard, it really is, since all three of you are close friends.

anyway, so today was kinda fun actually. kinda, sorta, I dunno. I enjoyed being rebellious (?) though. we had recess early, and somehow I'm happy that I sound more together lately. before I've been talking a lot of gibberish due to my temporary bipolar disorder. so since yesterday, since she came back, I felt better. anyways today we had recess early because there was supposed to be a program called Money Tree by Maybank. so since all the classes were having the same program I decided to become a 4SM student. haha. they asked me to audition and all that (you know, SM, whatever.) and we played a bunch of games since the people came late. can't help but laugh when Cassie de-merited Shahira for eating in class but she rolled her eyes about it. maybe because she was more worried about the phone in her file (shh).
later we found out the classes were gonna combine and despite my guilt for leaving Aina behind with my class, I stayed with SM even though they were supposed to combine with KK. Amelia, their KD gave me a break by adding me to the class count. I hope SA didn't mind. lol they probably didn't even notice or maybe lost interest on my whereabouts further into the program.

so the game was kinda annoying. at first it seemed really interesting but it got more annoying when the guy couldn't get what I was trying to answer and he seemed really biased. but whatever. since he can't understand me my answers wouldn't be counted therefore I shouldn't play at all. there was a point where I just sat there staring at all those people screaming 'grab' for a chance to answer. at this point my feedback form had already been filled in. my comment was about how they make us feel pissed off because they were so biased. of course, I didn't put my real name (Lynn :P is not my real name.) nor did I put in my real number, or e-mail, or even birth date (I think they can tell since Baekhyun was born four years and two days before I did). I also put 'shipal' and 'baka' around the comments, and about the yes or no questions, there was one about being more confident about my future and I'm like.. no. just, no. they thought us a lot of things but how can these three hours make me more confident about my future? I need like, a full course on banking to actually be confident about my future, since I have no idea how banks works anyway. all I know is that they keep money, and give it to us when we need it. or when we have the card and pin code.
back to the forms. Shahira's was the messiest (she started all this anyway, I just knew my limit) because she wrote her name at first but after all the insults we had to liquid her name and email out and put anonymous. we had to liquid that a couple of times too because she wasn't sure how to spell it. Ili was definitely the funniest. she wrote about how she's disappointed MBLAQ's not coming to Malaysia and they're making it all worse. unfortunately, she wrote it all in pencil so when it came to handing it in she erased it all. Ain made no comment. Ida said that the guy was being unfair towards the ones at the back (yea that's us).

so yea. that was today.

I've been watching Shut Up! Flower Boy Band. I dunno I guess I'm really trying hard to find something to do. When I finished TPOBAW I really wanted to find another book to read but there were no recommendations. Khairun recommended this drama and since I saw the GIF of them eating ramyun together I really felt like I could relate. today I watched the second episode when Byunghee died and even though I know he was gonna die, I still teared up. I can imagine me watching it on TV for the first time without spoilers. I'd really cry then, and I'll hate the drama forever for ending the episode like that. I really will.



Korean band CNBLUE will build a school under their name in a village in Western Africa, according to a press release from their agency FNC Entertainment on Wednesday. 
FNC said that CNBLUE is building a school in the village named Niamadougou, Burkina Paso, an underdeveloped country in Africa, to improve one of the world’s poorest nation’s educational environment.
With the decision, they will be assisting around 1,100 children from the village with after school classes and lunch fees, annually.
CNBLUE‘s charitable efforts, which already took off last month, will be donated with a portion of the band’s album and concert ticket sales.
We’ve been searching for ways to repay for the incredible love of our fans and came up with the school project,” the officials said in the statement. “We’ll continuously support abused and neglected children (around the world).
Composed of Lee Jung-shin, Jung Yong-hwa, Kang Min-hyuk and Lee Jong-hyun,CNBLUE made their comeback after dropping the third mini-album “EAR FUN” on March 26.
Based on data compiled by Hanteo, CNBLUE‘s new album moved around 53,155 copies just in seven days after the release last week.


what's funny about Jonghyun is that when they all post on their blog, Jonghyun is the most expressionless out of all of them. everyone has at least one exclamation mark and Jonghyun's all '.' <--what is this called?

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